collide...

[disclaimer: these are just thoughts running through my mind while I can't sleep.]

As my friends head back to school, I am left with virtually nothing to do but think. Thus far, this week has been full of reflection.

It is 2:18 AM and I'm up... "The Best Man" is playing on my TV screen, but I'm not really paying attention. Thoughts just keep colliding into each other. I sit in the corner of the couch in the den, which happens to be my favorite spot in this house. I was tweeting my life away until my internet started being janky. So, here I am again... thinking.

Thinking about all the things I have done in my nineteen years, nine months and twenty-one days of my life... and all of the things to come.

I feel like in my past, I have let many influence my decisions. Decisions about relationships (romantic and otherwise), school, religious beliefs, spending habits... basically everything that matters.

But over the last six or so months, I've learned that when "shit hits the fan" I can't go back and blame anyone but myself for the decisions I have made. I am an adult and blaming anyone for anything that may go opposite of what I expected is just plain irresponsible.

So, I am going to fix relationships that were ruined because of advice I received from someone that just went through it. I will write like there is no tomorrow. I am going to apply for an internship even though people think that I will have too much going on to manage. Time management is key and I know I can do it....

But I'm going to stop talking about what I am going to do and just do it. It's all about walking the walk...